“Dear John”

 

Reviewed 3 February 2010 by Ted Faraone

 

Two stars out of five; $4.00 ticket on a scale of $0 to $12.50

 

THE TITLE SAYS IT ALL

 

“Dear John,” the latest feature from helmer Lasse Hallström, is a great lumbering mish-mash of a movie directed with all the subtlety of a tugboat pulling an ocean liner out of its berth.  The title says it all.  “Dear John” is slang for the letter that a lot of unhappy American soldiers got from their stateside girlfriends during the Second World War, a letter telling them that they had found another guy.  So it is that John Tyree (Channing Tatum), a sergeant in the US Special Forces, gets a Dear John letter from the stunning Savannah Curtis (Amanda Seyfried) while on duty in Afghanistan.  Much of pic’s 102 minutes (which cover about seven years and leave auds feeling as if they had lived the flick in real time), are told in flashback after John is shot helping a wounded comrade.

 

Pic’s biggest problem is telegraphy.  Hallström never misses a chance to telegraph a plot twist.  For example, the meet cute between Tyree and Curtis takes place near a pier on which Curtis and a slightly clumsy friend who has a crush on her stand amid a group of college kids on spring break while surfer dude Tyree, on leave, stands nearby.  Slightly clumsy guy with crush (Scott Porter) accidentally pushes Curtis’ purse into the ocean, causing consternation (“My entire life is in that bag.”)  Tyree makes a 20 foot dive off the pier and recovers the bag.  The rest is history.

 

Complications include Tyree’s dad (Richard Jenkins), whose character suffers from Asperger’s Syndrome, a mild form of Autism, and obsessive-compulsive disorder.  He also raised his son as a single dad.  Another complication comes courtesy of Osama Bin Laden -- the September 11, 2001 attacks on the US which prompted not only the Afghan War but also the re-enlistment of Sergeant Tyree, much to the dismay of his pretty girlfriend.

 

The plot clunks along, moved in part by letters between the young lovers in voiceover -- until the Dear John letter arrives.  Here Hallström attempts to deceive auds by withholding the identity of the other guy.  One is led to believe that it’s the slightly clumsy friend, but his identity has by this point been telegraphed… He’s a neighbor, a single dad, whose only kid is an autistic boy.

 

Enough already….  “Dear John” suffers from an identity crisis.  It is at once chick flick, buddy flick (Tyree and Dad), and an epic.  Within the love story element pic is not quite sure whether it’s a boy-girl love story or a daddy-son love story.  However, it gets kudos for showing real respect to the people who join America’s volunteer armed forces.

 

Plot involves a reversal of fortune for Curtis.  She marries Tim (Henry Thomas) knowing that he has Lymphoma.  She does it to care for him.  Poor little rich kid goes broke paying the medical bills.  Reality check:  A lifelong friend develops cancer.  You care for him.  You don’t have to marry him -- especially when you’re still carrying a torch for the other, hotter guy.  Get real, Girl!

 

There’s a flipside to Curtis’ reversal of fortune.  Tyree’s dad is a lifelong numismatist.  It’s a fabulous hobby for those with obsessive compulsive disorder.  He dies.  No one shows up at his funeral.  You can figure out the rest.

 

Tech credits are good.  Seyfried, Tatum, and Jenkins are accomplished thesps, and the first two are extraordinarily attractive.  Too bad about the material.  Pic, an adaptation of Nicholas Sparks’ eponymous novel, carries a PG-13 rating for some really vanilla sex which is more inferred than performed as well as some violent battle scenes.  Take the kids if they are insomniacs.

 

--30--

 

Photos (top to bottom):  Channing Tatum and Amanda Seyfried sare a kiss in the rain; Helmer Lasse Hallström & Tatum; Richard Jenkins; Herny Thomas; Seyfried & Horse.